Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Chloe & Jack

Thank you for the prayers and words of encouragement after my last post. I'm thankful to report that after "dumping" on the blog, reaching out to some friends, crying my eyes out, praying, and a good night of sleep; I felt much better the next morning.

Then I realized why I was so emotional. Let me restate that - I realized there was something in addition to my grief over Chloe that was making me extra emotional. Jose's birthday was September 25 and he wouldn't be celebrating with his little girl. That made me really sad. I hadn't realized that fact until that point. It just wasn't right that she wasn't here.

In addition, my mom's birthday was September 28 and the loss was there in the back of my mind. It was the first time that I realized that Chloe's milestone dates are close to other significant dates. Chloe, Jose', and my mom would have all had birthdays in September. Instead, Chloe and I both have birthdays in April.

We also found out Chloe's fatal diagnosis in March - the month my mom passed away. And Mother's Day is really close to our Anniversary.

I don't know why happy days are mixed with sad days. Maybe that is God's way of reminding us that life includes highs and lows. Or giving us something to be thankful for in the midst of the loss? On September 4 we were sad to not have
Chloe. On September 25 I was excited to be married to an awesome husband and celebrate the day he was born. Then September 28 - thankful for my mom, but missing her since she is gone. I just find it interesting how the dates are so close together.

Something else happened this month too. A friend delivered her precious baby, Jack on September 15. Even though they received a fatal diagnosis, she chose to carry Jack to term. He lived for almost 16 hours and slipped into Heaven from his mommy's arms. Several of my favorite mom's from the blogs reached out to her to comfort her in her loss. Thank you! She is heart broken, of course, but the comfort, prayers and support she is receiving makes a huge difference. Please continue to keep her in your prayers.

I can't share about it now, but it looks like God is using Chloe and Jack to do some exciting things for families in our area who receive a fatal diagnosis. What a blessing and humbling experience to think that their little lives, so fragile and brief, could be the start of big things. God does work in mysterious ways. I'll keep you posted - your prayers would be appreciated.

God's blessings on you today. He is faithful through the highs and the lows. So, if you are at a low point, don't lose hope - things will get better right around the corner.


boltefamily said...

Chloe and Jack are such amazing blessings and I have no doubt they are going to continue to do awesome things eventhough they are not here with us.

I also have such days of grief and joy intertwined and I think you are right...I think it is God's way maybe of keeping things balanced with highs and lows.

Please know I am praying for you and for Jack's Mommy! You are both so precious to me!

Love and prayers,

boltefamily said...

Just stopping by again to say I am thinking of you!

Love ya!

Sharleen said...

Hi Kirsten!

I got your comment on my blog. I have to admit I was on your blog last week. I found it on the baby loss directory. I decided to click on your's because I liked the name of your blog. Like you pointed out Jack & Joy share the same birthday. Please feel free to pass my info on to Jack's Mommy.
I'm fairly new to all of this , but it is so great to have the prayers and support of other Mommy's who have had to deal with such devastating loss.
Hugs and prayers to you!

Kenzie said...

The highs and the lows... they are so intertwined aren't they! I love the perspective that you have on that... God's way of reminding us... I am so thankful for you and for Jack's mommy. She is sweet and of course you are extra-sweet... but I LOVE how the Lord is using Chloe and Jack's little lives to touch so many.

So much love and prayer!

Trisha said...

First off...thank you for checking in on me and my family. How selfless are you? Thank you. I haven't is keeping me horribley tied up. Plus...I think only two people read my blogg, so I didn't think it would be missed! :)
I am praying for you...I am sorry for the rough times that you have been having...He will carry you through. I would have to agree with Kristy, that God intertwines the joy with the grief so as to provide some sort of balance. He does not give us more than we can handle and certainly is compelled to remind us that He is with us always via joy and peace.
Thinking of you...Praying for you in San Diego.

Kim ( said...

Thinking of you today especially and remembering sweet Chloe Faith with love!

Emily said...

Thinking of you and your sweet Chloe today.