Monday, March 31, 2008

Praise in the Midst of our Trial

As you know, the last week has been intense for us. Yet, God has been holding us together and giving us strength for each hour. There have been so many blessings and demonstrations of His presence in the last week. They have been an encouragement to us and hopefully to all who read this e-mail.

On Wed. night we needed to know that God cared and that He was present in our circumstances. Intellectually we knew that He was, but we needed some reassurance. At 9:28 pm a 3.1 earthquake hit Newport Beach. We have never heard of an earthquake hitting Newport Beach before. We felt God had sent us the message that He knew exactly what we were going through, that He was with us and a reminder of His power.

On Friday, the rise in the amniotic fluid was such a blessing. Although we were not able to get the sample, and we will continue to try, there is a peace in knowing that we are doing all that we can to find out as much information as we can.

On Sunday, Jose and I received prayer at church. They prayed for hope, restoration, comfort, peace and restful sleep for both of us and God's will. God has provided all of these. When we walked in I looked like a human black cloud, and upon leaving there was a distinct difference in my appearance, my outlook and my level of peace.

Pam felt prompted that we should have Communion (and therefore the baby had communion). They had a picture of Jesus and a precious baby looking at each other and smiling with Jeremiah 1:5 "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you. Before you were born I set you apart." At first when I looked at the picture my heart broke, but now I look at the picture with hope and peace - knowing that God will heal this baby (either here on Earth or in heaven). And there is no better place for the baby to be than restored and in the arms of Jesus and Grandma Carmen (my mom) in heaven.

When we went in I was still uncertain about what the future would hold in terms of children. The women prayed for life in my womb and the promises of God that we would have children. I had been seeing a picture of our child, about 3 or 4 years old with curly blond hair laughing and dancing around on the rocks at our church. The picture had begun to sting when thoughts that it might never be would come. I shared it during the prayer time and Pam asked if it was a boy. It was a girl, so we believe that God plans for us to have 2 children. Jose's mom told us later that day she had a dream on Wed. that we were eating lunch at her table with our blond haired son and daughter.

Another picture from Felicia was of Jesus pushing me in a swing with flowers, butterflies and a bright light around me. It was such a picture of hope, new life, love and a reminder that what we are walking through is temporary and that there is joy on the other side of our mourning.

There were several scriptures that were given to us that comforted us and gave us strength.

Psalm 115-118. We had been reading Ps. 118 and been finding comfort in it daily. We told Jose's mom and she brought out her daily devotional - Ps. 118 was the scripture reading of the day.

Psalm 23 & 91 - we had been reading 23 daily

Romans 3:3a - "For what if some did not believe? Will their unbelief make the faithfulness of God without effect? Certainly not!"

I Kings 8:56 - "Blessed by the Lord, who has given rest to His people Israel, according to all that He promised. There has not failed one word of all His good promise, which He promised through His servant Moses."

Daniel 3:16-17 - when Shadrach, Meshack and Abed-Nego were in the fire and God brought them through unharmed. We are in the fire, but He will bring us through it and we will not turn away from Him.

Mark 11:22 - God can move mountains

There were so many more. It was such a blessing and God did a lot of healing in that prayer time. Jose and I both slept soundly last night and feel much more at peace. We know that we still have a long road ahead, uncertain about what it will look like day by day, but confident that God is in control and that He will sustain us through it all.

We can't thank you enough for the prayers, support, e-mails, phone calls and love that you are sending our way. They are such a help to us. We welcome phone calls and any other form of contact that you feel comfortable with.

We appreciate your continued prayers. We have another ultrasound today and will attempt an amnio - we are praying for lots of amniotic fluid and no contractions so that we can get a sample.

We love you all and thank God for using you to help us get through this difficult road.

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